HWNL Letters

  Sugar, spice and everything nice  - my left foot! More like vinegar, salt, and if-I-kill-them-it-ain't-my-fault!   So you think she needs an old-school-southern-style whoopin ' but your spouse doesn't believe in spanking children. You've been arguing about "What the heck a time-out even is " and you're about ready to send BOTH your baby girl AND your spouse back to Jesus! What do you do when you were both raised in different cultures and  have different views on parenting? Hey Fam-Lei! Lady XO here! Now... because I'm not any kind of child psychology expert; I first have to say that these ideas and practices come from a place of personal opinion and experience only. I'm just a mom/step-mom of 10 kids, youth pastor, and former teacher; therefore, would consider myself an experienced COACH at best! But mostly, I'm just a friend sharing my story! And before I continue... It's important to look at this topic in two parts: 1) The Parenting I

  “And I keeps me a piece of steel ”! ~Madea~ I can’t tell you just how much these plays made me laugh!   If you’re new to  Tyler Perry's Madea plays, well...   That’s just a massive rock that you’ve been living under my loves! And you seriously need to watch them! The plays are family-themed and Christian influenced. But more than anything, They have a level of hilarity that is surprising considering the heavy nature of the plots and... Tyler. Will. Have. You. Laughing. INCESSANTLY! Which is a bit of what we try to do here at Happy Wife, Nappy Life too... 👋 Hey Fam-Lei! 👋 Lady XO here! I know you’re all thinking... “What does this have to do with Practicing Peace in my home?” And I answer... It’s a literal example of something I used to do to practice peace in my own home. Let me elaborate a bit... Putting on a movie is a "spirit invoking tool".   It's the same reason why people cry on sad scenes or yell at the movie screen at the scary parts. They cry because th

It's our jobs as spouses to protect the hearts of our loved ones. To nurture them... In doing so; The HARDEST PART Is forgiving someone for a hurt they NEVER apologized for. "Sometimes in life we have to learn to accept an apology in which we never receive to manifest the understanding that we've always wanted". ~Pastor CJ Allen~ We tend to have an unbending, almost animalistic protective nature when it comes to our kids but when it comes to our spouses, it’s different. You would quite literally  die  for your kids.   And though we like to believe that we would do the same for our spouses, the truth is...   We can’t even handle the painful words our spouses dish out during conflict, nonetheless take a bullet to the chest! So...  How do  you kill your pride, bite the bullet and be the BIGGER person when tensions are high? Keep Your Peace, Draw the line! Ladies, I don't mean to go out hollering at your husband with your hand on your hip saying,  "I'm drawi

************************************* It's such a pretty thought...  Isn't it? Someone to love you no matter what you do? Or... As we say here in the south -  Someone who loves your "dirty draws and all"!  Eew... I mean... AWEEEEEE!!! But the truth about unconditional love is that finding it is actually anything but PRETTY... Wait...  What??? Let me explain... The unfortunate part about loving someone UN-conditionally is that in order to learn how deep their love is; you have to:  1) Push a boundary that hurts that person in a major way THEN 2) That person has to FORGIVE you and THEN 3) LOVE you ALL the same... WITHOUT a condition attached to it... THUS why it's called UN-conditional love. They love you when you're at your BEST and when you're at your very WORST. I mean, They love you no matter how old ... Or grey ... Or fat ... Or sick ... Or poor... Or mean  you get... ( And yes, regardless of how many teeth are still in